New leaf in another continent

Smell

Smell june 28-2010

i know
i saw u today
i saw u today
i saw u cross before me
i smelt u
and it intoxicated me

i closed my eyes
for a deep inhale

i slowly opened to feel ur warmth
u where no where
nor was i
it was a desert
with no pyramids
hot and sultry
dry and vast
i searched for u
looked around
and there i saw u behind a single tree

i ran
ran
with thirst
i went closer with a sparky smile
it wasnt u
it wasnt "just " u
it was a shadow from no where

i cried
i cried aloud
coz
i smelt u
i smell u still
the intoxicating fragrance -
kills me
pulls me

i closed my eyes
and i was shivering
shivering from cold winds

there i saw u in the high mountain top of alps
observing clouds up in the sky

windy,windy
was the only thing around
my imagination wandered
my heart leaped..
n i feel down wid a heavy thud

i was weak when i got up
i looked around
i was in hospital
injured
n i smelt u there


it was too late
to remember or
to be reminded about

the smell was inside me
u r no where
but within me
inside me
and realization was the point i lost u

lost u forever
miss u



PS
hey friends..i imagined a situation of a guy who misses his lover
and here is when n how he thinks of her ..:-)
i was scared that u guys would think that i would have probably smelt a egg biriyani! "no"
i dint smell anything but now after the word egg..i seriously smell something right here right now:-)


H in dreams abt food

PImples MY love

What so ever,its been long since I spoke out or broke out or burst out-heheh..

So here is it ,today its all about my Pimples,Its so very natural when in adolescence ,People like me get pimples..and few really freak out unlike me!I dint even give a damn thing to it.well We went to doc who asked me to eat anything that is without oil and for heaven sake,I freaked out hearing the word "no non veg" thats when a bulb came out like in mind like in cartoons which said"moota briyani ya illa clear skin ahhhh"-well i need not say what road i would have taken"its like an open secret"

I grew up,used himalaya face wash ,all diff pack once a while,or a little massage without scrub,i dont know weather it worked out or not but i having got used to see my face with it-ust dint like it clear.

I am no model or my face doesnt come in magazines with all those dark kajals and clear face with fancy multi colored eye shadows!i am so tired of explaining and ppl giving me advices!

Story NUmber 1:
Couple of months back ,when the sun really shuts inside the clouds,a happy evening,good hair day,i walk around when the trees are purely bathed and all in green and so was my eyes,HAPPY DAY.I go for a walk and i had to cross the road -in exact crossing,A young lady in salwar,watched me closely or stared would be the perfect word.I smiled at last and she came closer a bit and i thought-(like me,She needs company to cross the road"pola ,adhan".Then she was like",Aiyo,what do u apply to ur face,It looks ugly and bad,and wt u do to pimples,I got some and i dont know what to do and i dont see mirror " and it seems there is some myth which says that if u see mirror with pimples on,u tend to get more and so she doesn see for days(unbelievable )and i stayed cool and smiled and replied patiently that its the age and i dont care!

but it really did upset me.I could have blasted her but i really thought she was concerned!Plus i had a beautiful day though alone and some stranger need not ruin it.(i see that lady once a while in this area )

Story NUmber 2:
Today,i happen to go into Health and glow in a mall just to gaze around.There a lady who wants to sell some Product from Lotus was behind(well,thats their duty to ask and to relate to customers-Fine)then she asked me again ,i told her i use himalayas and no other face wash,She again said something organic n blah blah,i said clearly n softly that i would want to try more.Then she said"illa madam,pimples clear aghum"-i said no but thanks and she bugged me that i had marks on my face-i gave her some look and said with anger that I DONt WANT IT.It so simple,If u want to sell your product ,give it as suggestion or explain or compare products but dont pull somebody down just because somebody like me have pimples.Its crazy,It like you are making somebody rude.I then came out of that store but i couldnt speak more -nothing blured out.I was close to tears out of controlled anger!

I know,This is nothing and i can stay cool but i dont think thats gonah help when i look at myself!Am tired of using and changing products.I dont have complains with the present.

This is simple.I am with pimples and I would be incomplete without pimpy.I love for what i am than what i am not.PLus i am staying in "teen age"though i am not !I am Proud to say I am still in it and i dont hide my face just coz i have It.

PS:This is just an outcome and no advices:)here:)
Fun Fact:Once i applied tooth paste to make it clear and i believed- like kids believe in tooth fairy who comes when to carry your tooth when asleep!And i also tried curry leaves paste!though neem worked out!but i seriously cant apply manjal and sit at home all day !am no goddess!:)Am presently using Proactive!
Let it stay until it wants:)


With love
Pimpy!

S-Am waiting

I dont see you always
I dont think of you

but you walk across me
In everything I see

the car,the number,the towel--
the star,the moon,the sky
the rain,the green,the white

You make me miss you
You make me not own you
though i do

I love you
I gave you what you wished
That was to give you back as such
i know you wait for me
Am helpless but with hope

Come back to me
I am waiting:)

H

I tasted wine:)I know i shouldnt be saying it but i did

scene 1
I was surfing web as usual-Which has become a daily routine next to food and water-ofourse its nothing other than facebook

scene 2
Maid was sweeping the floor and she came up to me -she never talks and when she does-she always has a point-so our madam came up to me with a question"DO U DRINK WINE?---I become wide awake.blood running all our my head though i knew i never did things beyond but again-the pulse increased,i casually said"i never drink nor tried "

pause

she asked -then NO BEER?I said WE dont drink 'aka" and might have tasted some in some italian food back then but not with knowledge and who cares as long as the food is good.
she tried to convince me "illa ma,bachelor pasangha drink -those who wear mookha pants drink"-i understood she is eventually hitting on me coz i have been wearing my threeforths track due to the chillness.
i said we r not bachelors or living toegther partners but we are FAMILY ---


pause

my mind kept wondering
she finished her work


I was all wonders and landed in kitchen with my mug and i understood wt led to all these questions


It was this crazy bottle of oilve oil "cardio oil" which i intend to try was on floor which seem to have looked like wine to her

i asked her "is this why you asked me ?" taking the bottle-
she grinned--


Well-i now knew something.That i used my mind very much like sherlock holmes to find a sappa matter.what a nice way to start a day:)

sweet night to all.

letters unanswered

"i am finding so many amazing things in my life but still i am not happy with it.Its like you are learning everything in the whole damn earth and you still feel helpless.The only thing i would ever want is you to sort me out n track me .I wish i could hold your pinky n walk beside you -fearless,daring,loving,caring and the joy of your warmth will take me forward for ever and ever"-

the eyes

THE EYES

I saw The Eyes
And those didn't recognize
Mine

Wondered,Who am I?
Well,a person with no "Identity"

My heart said"Accept"
Mind replied "No"

Why?
Recognition is not that matters
Being owned does!!!

Am I owned?
seems to !


H